


Rise Before the Fall

by floofsta_x



Category: Monsta X (Band), Pacific Rim (Movies)
Genre: M/M, Minor Chae Hyungwon/Son Hyunwoo | Shownu/Lee Minhyuk (Monsta X), Minor Shin Hoseok | Wonho/Yoo Kihyun, Multi, Terminal Illnesses
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-29
Updated: 2017-07-28
Packaged: 2018-11-21 07:06:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11352360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/floofsta_x/pseuds/floofsta_x
Summary: This is the story of two young men, recruited by necessity and hardened by combat. Forged into best friends in the cockpit of their Mark 2 Jaeger, Blind Rhythm, Lee Jooheon and Im Changkyun have managed to fight their way through 3 solo kills and 1 team drop without becoming an alien monster’s gigantic toy. However, it becomes so clear that nothing lasts forever. Changkyun is hiding a big, painful secret.





	1. One

#  **It is June, 2017.**

Almost two years ago, the first Kaiju emerged from the deep-sea rift known as the breach. Massive, terrifying, toxic, indestructible by conventional means, and hellbent on destruction, it ravaged a great part of the Californian coastline before finally meeting its end in the form of a nuclear warhead. There was great rejoicing. Everyone believed the threat to be over. The world sighed in relief and went on with the everyday, content to think that the terror was a singular event, a freak of space and time.

Yet, when the next reared its ugly head and leveled a good part of Tokyo, and the third headed for Sydney, Australia, the brutal truth had to be accepted. There was no end in sight. So, a council of world leaders from the nations of the Pacific Rim put their heads together. They needed a match for the towering Kaiju, the alien monsters. Thus, the Jaeger was born: a hunter, a soldier scaled up to the extreme of the alien threat. It was a crazy idea, but one that was eagerly received in light of such dire circumstances.

To be able to kill the fast-moving, agile Kaiju, scientists employed experimental technology. They hoped that the Jaegers could be controlled via mental power alone. The idea was that by syncing a man’s brain and the warrior, they would able to move as one, and naturally. Scientists quickly learned that one person on their own could not handle the load. When a second added their willpower, though, things ran a whole lot smoother.

Given the green light to proceed with production, within months, a small fleet of Jaegers rolled out. A governing organization for their maintenance and command was created, too: the Pan-Pacific Defense Corps. The Jaegers could not operate without pairs of pilots, and so teams from around the world were meticulously chosen and trained. They were the first on the front lines, and ultimately also the first to realize that humankind’s gamble was paying off. One Kaiju was killed at the hands of a Jaeger. A second, six months later. The next, four months following.

Now, there is an emergence about every 5 weeks. The ragtag teams of rangers and Jaegers that exist at various points around the Pacific Rim have managed to check them off as they have come, but there have been unforeseen consequences for many. Innocent civilians have died of Kaiju Blue, from attack, and from fear and panic. Mark 1 and 2 Jaegers have gone down, killing pilots, experienced and inexperienced alike. The world is tired, though the human spirit fights on.

This is the story of two young men, recruited by necessity and hardened by combat. Forged into best friends in the cockpit of their Mark 2 Jaeger, Blind Rhythm, Lee Jooheon and Im Changkyun have managed to fight their way through 3 solo kills and 1 team drop without becoming an alien monster’s gigantic toy. They’ve just been deployed again, against the biggest, nastiest Kaiju yet, and they’re going to need every bit of wit, skill and strength they can muster…

 

* * *

 

Lee Jooheon jerked out of his deep, dreamless slumber and almost instantly realized that something was wrong. The familiar, piercing sound of sirens rang in his ears and bright light pushed the dark away as the LED screen on the wall of the bunkroom lit up. Though he was still hazy and scrabbling for alertness, one thought ran through his head and one thought alone:  _Kaiju. And since the screen is up, we’re being deployed, then._  Groaning, he rolled over and rubbed his eyes, then glanced toward the clock on the wall. 12:15 blinked back at him in blocky lines. 

“Changkyun? Hey, let’s go man. We’re up.” The messy-haired, chubby-cheeked boy groaned sleepily, wiggling a little bit to rock the bed. Doubtless, momentarily there would come a reply like  _“Ok, ok, you don’t need to tell me twice, Jooheon hyung.”_

But there was only silence. “ _Come on_ , don’t act like the maknae. People need us–” 

 _Wait a minute. I don’t even hear breathing._  Jooheon rolled and slid out of bed, dropping the little ways to the ground, his knees bent as he hit the floor. Glancing behind him, it hit him that his suspicion was correct. The bottom bunk was empty, sheets not even touched. 

Dread descended on him. “Kyunie…where did you go this time?” he half-asked, sighed and squeezed the bridge of his nose between two fingers. It was a futile question, only for his own peace of mind; he knew without even having to look around that his co-pilot wasn’t here. 

The LED panel was urgently trying to blind him, but it didn’t matter at the moment. As he stood there and tried to get the gears of his brain moving, Jooheon couldn’t seem to think of anything else but his best friend and partner in crime. Changkyun meant the world to him. They had flown together for three years, first in basic training, then the Air Force, and now for the PPDC. Now, on missions, they lived in each others’ heads, but far before that, they had known their friendship was special. It had always been so natural, and though they had a few hard times they found themselves unable to stay away for long.

Apparently, others noticed too. Six months ago, an officer had approached them and recruited them for the PPDC. Jooheon and Changkyun had become part of the second generation of Jaeger pilots. Many commented on how strong their drift compatibility was. At first, both of them thought that it was a blessing. Then, they rushed through training (the Los Angeles Academy was still non-existent at that point) before ultimately command told them that they were to fill the cockpit of a Mark 2.

Blind Rhythm, they named the mech–and the duo learned very quickly how truly terrifying facing down a Kaiju was. It was without a doubt the scariest thing anyone could do, but together they had managed to keep their cool and bagged their first kill.

The next one was a little better than the first. The third went down in no time. And now they were about to be thrust into the fray again.

Once the cold of the concrete floor had seeped into his bones and he felt alert enough to think, Jooheon glanced over at the screen at long last. This kaiju–Blitzkrieg, apparently–was hands down the biggest that had ever emerged from the breach. They already had stats on it, as well as possible primary offensive strategies and mechanisms. Thirty minutes until report time, the red clock in the corner blinked forebodingly.  _Thirty minutes to find my co-pilot._

As he pulled on a pair of tennis shoes on, Jooheon shook his head and rubbed the sleep from his eyes, then dove out the door in his boxers and rumpled tank top. He didn’t care that he wasn’t wearing socks, that his hair was a mess, that he probably looked like he had walked out of the apocalypse. His brain was going too fast, thinking of possible places to find a twenty-one year old boy–because in a few ways he still was a boy–Changkyunie.

Jooheon jogged down the corridor, purposefully passing halls of bunks and quarters. His instinct was to ask someone, and of course the first person to cross his mind was Shin “Wonho” Hoseok, head of Blind Rhythm’s J-Tech team. Hoseok-hyung was a good friend of theirs and always supportive. Many admired him for his body, but those who really knew him easily saw that he was as kind-hearted as handsome and sexy.

Finally Jooheon pulled up in front of the door he needed and knocked. Faintly, from inside, there came,  _“Just a minute!”_  

That was fine. He had seconds to spare; also, it was a perfect moment to lean forward and catch his breath. Finally, the doorknob wiggled and none other than Wonho himself pulled it open. 

Boy, was he a sight. His dark, blue-green streaked hair stuck out oddly, and he was half-naked and adjusting his boxers, like he had just put them on and pulled them up. More than that, though, Hoseok…well, to put it nicely, it looked like someone had been having a little bit of fun with him. Lines of red and black hickeys dotted his neck and collarbone, and his lips (plus the immediate area around them) were redder and more swollen than usual.

“Jooheon-ah!” He gasped when he realized who it was. “What are you doing here, shouldn’t you should be suiting up–”

“I know, I know.” The chubby-cheeked pilot waved his hand dismissively, and before the older boy could protest he cut in, “Have you seen or heard from Changkyun? I can’t find him.”

“No, I haven’t.”

“Who is it, Hoseok-ah?” In the dark, another voice spoke; moments later, someone else quite unashamedly came up behind Wonho and wrapped their arms around his torso. A lazy hand ran down his chest and defined abs. Not too much to Jooheon’s surprise, it was Yoo Kihyun, another friend and a doctor in the medical bay. So  _that_  was why Wonho had been finding every excuse to go there lately.

“Jooheonie.” Kihyun said with surprise, regaining his professional posture, though he didn’t remove his arms from around the older man’s waist. “Why are you here? You drop in 25 minutes.”

“He’s looking for I.M.” Wonho explained, patting the hand on his stomach and subtly lacing his fingers with Kihyun’s. “You haven’t happened to see him, have you?”

The black-haired, sharp-faced doctor shook his head. “No. But–I have heard people say that for the last month or so, he goes outside at night. To the lake.”

Jooheon abruptly remembered the last time they had drifted, and mentally rebuked himself for not thinking of it sooner. He had found out that his best friend took nightly trips to the small man-made lake just beyond the compound to watch the stars and moon, and also forget about the throbbing, sometimes excruciating, pain in his head, at the base of his brain. “Oh yeah. Say no more. Thanks.” He glanced between the two touchy boys at the door. “I’m sorry I disturbed you.”

“It’s alright, Jooheon-ah.” Wonho smiled encouragingly. “Just, go find Changkyunie and whip some Kaiju ass…ok?”

“Will do, hyung.”

“We’ll be here for you when you return as heroes.” As the pilot stepped back and nodded, turning to go, Hoseok thought of one more thing and blurted, “Jooheonie?”

“Yeah?”

“Will you please…not tell anyone?”

There it was. Jooheon knew that Wonho wasn’t oblivious to the state he was in. If that hadn’t done it, Kihyun’s loving gestures gave it away, and on top of that, Kihyun had placed himself straight behind Wonho because he was stark naked. It would take someone horribly stupid to not see the truth.

Jooheon smirked and nodded. “My lips are sealed.” Of course, there was also the drift, but Changkyun would totally understand. Both of them wanted Hoseok-hyung to be happy, and neither had ever seen him as radiant as he had been in the last few weeks. It was obvious, now, why that was.

With a final duck of his head to his hyungs, Jooheon took off in the direction of the exit.

 

* * *

 

Not too much later, he found his co-pilot sitting out on the end of the big dock, staring down into the water, tossing a little electronic thingy-or-other out across the lake, and catching it as it came back to him. He had invented it, probably. Jooheon couldn’t help but take a moment to stop and appreciate how ethereal Changkyun looked, sitting there with a leg up on the pier, gently bobbing up and down as the waves washed up against the floating walkway, and bathed in the light of the quarter-moon.

“Hyung.” Changkyun’s low voice rumbled as the older boy approached, and he tossed his creation out and bent his leg so that his co-pilot could sit beside him.

“Hey, Changkyunie.” Jooheon took the spot, content to relax a little and wait. He dipped a toe in the water, making ripples and watching them expand outward, the proverbial drop in the bucket of time or whatever that shit was.

Finally the older boy broke the silence. “Is it your head again?”

“It’s always my head.” Changkyun tapped the back of his neck, immediately above the first vertebrae. “Right there.”

“Yeah–I know, I felt it last drift. Weren’t you supposed to have an appointment in med bay about it?”

“I did.” Somewhere, a cricket stopped chirping, engulfing the boys in a moment of silence before another started up somewhere else. “Kihyun-ah–he and Hoseok are friends with benefits you know–ran some MRIs and told me that he’d see me again in a couple of days. He’s convincing, but couldn’t fool me. I know when a person’s beside himself.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

A storm of anger clouded Changkyun’s face. “He was pitying me. Dammit, Jooheon, I wish I knew why.” For a brief moment, Changkyun tensed before he was pulling in huge breaths, letting them out, and lowly humming an indiscernible tune. His pre-combat destress routine, he called it. “But that’s not going to help me now. I’ve gotta relax.”

“So you know, then. About the Kaiju.”

Wordlessly, the younger boy lifted his phone, and pulling his earbuds out of the headphone jack, flipped on the screen and gave it a shake. Voices started blaring through the speaker: various people in command, lead techs, LOCCENT. Almost the moment he did, familiar codes and names came over the air.

 _“514-M. Where are J and I? They’re not in their room or in the DR_ [drivesuit room] _. Alpha’s wondering as well. Over.”_

_“ _514-W to 514-M and 514-Alpha._ I’ve seen them. They’ll be there on time. Give them space. Over.”_

Jooheon chuckled and shook his head. “You scoundrel, hacking the shatterdome’s private channel.” They normally had access to the feed, too, but with a special pager that was currently sitting in a drawer somewhere back in their room and definitely not with something as insecure as a cellphone. The channel was hidden to standard searching devices and came up blank, but somehow Changkyun had managed to tweak the phone or find another devious, secret way to listen.

“I haven’t cracked the frequency that matters, though.”

“Huh? You mean the one that Marshal Hyunwoo supposedly uses to talk to H.One? You still really believe that fantasy of yours is real?”

“Then why do we have seven 514 codes? And the last one’s 514-H, huh?”

“That’s easy. It’s from when Hyunwoo wasn’t in high command yet. He was only given the title Alpha after that happened.”

“Bull. He was 514-S; that was struck from the book a long time ago.”

Jooheon groaned, throwing his head back and giving an exasperated huff. “Think about what you’re saying, Changkyun. Our hyung? Talking to the most wanted man in South Korea, the Kaiju Black Market head?”

“Our research division gets the fresh material it does somehow. Also there’s substantial evidence for the rumor that Hyunwoo has a tryst with H.One.”

“That’s all just flying pigs and fucking lies to try to tear the Marshal down, and you know it.”

Changkyun sighed; but more because he wanted quiet and peace than anything else closely related to ‘You’ve won this one’. 

“Yeah, you’re probably right.”

Jooheon’s momentary anger at his partner cooled at the memory of how intense his pain was. Yeah, this stupid Shownu and H.One thing had existed prior, but–Jooheon couldn’t stop his friend from thinking altogether. Perhaps it made him forget the throb in the back of his head for a while or the stress that it put on him to be so young and have to fight things that could rip him apart limb from limb like nothing. Jooheon certainly had those coping mechanisms, too: rap, for instance. The occasional broken toaster or coffee pot. Looking after wizard hacker Changkyun. 

Finally, at long last, the older boy murmured, “Are you going to be ok to fly?”

Pressing his mouth into a line and sticking his tiny invention into his pocket, Changkyun nodded. “Yeah. I took some ibuprofen before I tried going to bed and I’ll have some more when we get back to the room.” He turned and pushed himself up, to his feet, holding out a hand for support as Jooheon stood. “I’ll be fine. Time to go draw some blue blood, yeah?”

“Hell, yeah.”

 

* * *

 

Just like Wonho had said, the two of them were right on time. Side by side they had their Drivesuits put on and stepped into the Conn-Pod. Once they were connected to the tangle of wires and metal comprising the command platform and feedback cradle, they made the drop onto Blind Rhythm’s nuclear-powered body. Jooheon and Changkyun felt themselves lock into the systems and start pulling weight with the Jaeger controls.

Not too long after that, a familiar, sunny voice crackled through the comms. “Welcome back, Blind Rhythm. Everything is looking smooth and clear and sunny…of course there’s no sun, but proverbially we’ll say–”

Changkyun groaned, glancing over at Jooheon and rolling his eyes. “We get it, Minhyuk…” 

“Ahem. Yes. Right. Well, the Marshal is now on deck, let’s get this Kaiju taken care of. Neural Handshake initiating in five seconds: five, four, three–”

This was the moment of truth. Jooheon and Changkyun glanced at each other one last time before they got sucked into the drift. The familiar falling feeling washed over them, of floating through each other’s memories: old ones from their childhoods, new ones from tonight, and everything in between. 

Finally they jerked back to the present. “Neural handshake holding, strong as ever…” Minhyuk noted, to be formal. For the Marshal, of course. The pilots swung into the calibration phase, before declaring that they were ready for combat, awaiting orders.

“Gentlemen, I hope you’re aware that this is a mother of a Kaiju.”

Gentle smiles spread on the faces of the two pilots at the sound of Marshal Hyunwoo’s voice. “Yes, we know that.” Jooheon responded with what they both were thinking.

“Good. Blitzkrieg is quickly approaching the miracle mile and seems to be heading for us; or, worse, Seoul. We can’t let it get past here. You are to dispatch it on sight.”

“Yes, sir.” 

The huge steel doors of the coastal shatterdome pulled apart with a groan. Blind Rhythm stepped out onto the tarmac, then into the cold, dark, but calm sea, striding out into the water, fists clenched. Jooheon reached up for a moment to flip off the comms. “Changkyun, I don’t feel as much pain as last time, but the pressure’s there–are you ok?”

“Yes, hyung, I told you.” 

The older boy’s eyes softened as he saw that his co-pilot was doing his best to contain his temper. “You realize that if you black out, I don’t think I can survive running this Jaeger by myself.”

 _Deep breaths, Changkyun._  Ran through both of their heads. Then,  _You’ll still try, though, won’t you Jooheon?_

_I care about you, Kyunie. I’d die for you. That’s why, yes, I’ll try, if worse comes to worse. But we need to kill this motherfucking terror together_ _._

 

* * *

 

A mile was nothing for a man as tall as a jaeger, and soon they were sitting in their target zone. “Ok Minhyuk, feed us things.” Changkyun said, eyes darting left and right. “Where is it?”

“It seems to be circling around; I think it’s sensed y–Oh,  _fuck!_ ” 

“What, Min–”

“It put on a burst of super speed–closing in on you, eleven o’clock–get out of the way, fast–!”

Blind Rhythm had just enough time to sidestep before a huge, black and blue figure emerged from the sea, mouth wide open and clawed arms extended. It missed, barely, and flew on past, landing back in the water, kicking up mist and waves as it swung around. A brief moment of calm passed. Both monster and mech seemed to be sizing each other up.

“Christ–you were right when you said it was a mother, Marshal,” Jooheon muttered in awe. In addition to being the largest Kaiju they had ever seen, Blitzkrieg was agile-looking. It was ugly, too, with the body of a big cat, a slender tail with a massive, clubbed end, and the face of a Gharial crocodile–except with more eyes and several layers of long, pointed teeth in its mouth. The beast growled ominously before opening its jaw wide and making another leap for Blind Rhythm.

“Arm razor!” Both boys shouted together and flicked their outside wrists. A gap opened up down the Jaeger’s arms; long, knife-like blades reaching from fist to shoulder slid out.

As the Kaiju landed on top and knocked them over into the water, Jooheon and Changkyun threw their first left hook. Though they were aiming for the neck, it nailed the beast in the side of the head instead. Not like that wasn’t as good of a hit, though. Blitzkrieg roared in pain and shook its head, backing off. The Jaeger managed to roll over (with some effort) and scrabbled back to its feet, water washing off of the gray hull.

They only had seconds before they were set on again, the stone-like mass on the Kaiju’s tail smashing into their side. Changkyun, the left hemisphere, cried out; the backwash of pain got Jooheon’s blood boiling.

“You–you son of a bitch!” The older boy roared and straightened, reaching out to grab the tail as it came around for another hit. “Give us that!” By then, Changkyun had recovered. Quickly he grabbed just below where Jooheon’s right hand was, flicking his wrist down. The sharp blade on the side of the Jaeger’s wrist sliced clean through, detaching the club.

The Kaiju’s roars were starting to become more angry than pained; but the two boys could tell that taking off the tail had hurt. Jooheon flung the dead flesh out to sea. Then at the sight of the beast’s gaping maw coming around to snap at them, he instinctively leaned in with a shoulder. The beast attached itself there, and this time the older pilot was the one to have white hot agony flash through him. He thought that he could feel the individual rows of teeth burrow in; the beast chewed a little. “Agh! This is your chance Changkyun!”

The younger boy gritted his teeth and put his arm up against the Kaiju’s exposed neck. Acidic blue blood started running down as the knives cut into its flesh.

As the monster reared back to get away, Jooheon summoned his strength and reached up, electrical wires sparking and popping, and grabbed onto the long jaw, pulling the whole beast back toward them and onto Changkyun’s arm. In one smooth, fluid motion the latter elbowed out, cutting deep, deep into a weak spot in the Kaiju’s armor. The only thing that stopped them from taking its head off completely was its spine.

Wheezing and unable to breathe, the Kaiju stepped back, knowing that it was at its end. Blood poured out of the gash the Jaeger had created. Together, Jooheon and Changkyun reached down and grabbed the snout once more, but from the underside, surging forward and pushing the beast back, bending its neck at an extreme angle. Moments later, a snap ripped through the air, and the beast hung lifeless in their grip. Everything was silent, except for the two pilots’ heavy breathing. Blue blood dripped from the Jaeger’s hands into the sea.

Then there was a cheer from LOCCENT, Minhyuk at the forefront of it. “Kaiju Blitzkrieg has been eliminated!“

“Good work, boys.” Marshal Hyunwoo told the two pilots. “Leave the body there, we’ll have a containment dome over it soon.”

 

* * *

 

Neither Jooheon nor Changkyun spoke to each other as they strode back through the water to the shatterdome. They really didn’t need to; they knew what was running through each other’s heads. Shock lingered from everything that had just happened–and so fast.

Techs were swarming all over the damaged mech almost the moment that it reached the bay and powered down. When the pilots stepped out of the conn-pod onto the high walkway, Wonho was waiting, a huge grin on his face. His collared uniform covered up the area where Jooheon knew Kihyun’s bruises had turned purple. “Congrats guys.”

“Thank you Hoseok.” Jooheon nodded to their friend and grinned.

But Changkyun said nothing, just shuffled and stared at the floor, rocking on the balls of his feet. For some reason, after being in a Jaeger, pilots could still often feel what the other was thinking even after the neural handshake broke. The first pilots had called it a Post-drift hangover, and the name stuck. The raging one Jooheon had now told him everything. 

The painkillers were wearing off, and the throb in the back of the younger boy’s head was now unbearable. He felt like he was about to black out, but determinedly he kept himself upright. It took all his strength. He hadn’t even noticed Hoseok standing there.

Behavior like this wasn’t normal for Changkyun, and Wonho quickly picked up that something was wrong. He made a worried face and tilted his head quizzically at Jooheon.

“It’s ok.” the chubby-cheeked pilot reached over and placed a hand gently on his best friend’s shoulder. The younger boy looked up at him, in the eyes. Pain was evident on Changkyun’s face, and sunk deep into his irises. “Maybe something happened during the drift, I should take him to the med bay–”

At ‘med bay’, Changkyun seemed to come alive, and he shrugged off the hand, cutting in almost defensively, “No. I’m fine. I just need a little while.” Jooheon could see him fill up his lungs all the way, and then with a calmer tone, addressed their hyung. “Yes, thank you, Hoseok. Please take care of her.” 

“I’ll do my best.” Wonho nodded, knowing full well that he was referring to the Jaeger. “Are you sure you’re alright?”

“Yes.” Exasperation seeped back into the maknae’s tone. “I just need out of this drivesuit.” He started pulling at the release latch for the spinal clamp, behind his head.

“Changkyunie,” someone called from down the walkway, and Minhyuk came jogging to them. “Wait, let’s get back to the DR.”

The tall, slender LOCCENT officer led them there, but they made slow progress. Jooheon had to catch Changkyun on his shoulder, after the latter stumbled and almost fell in the hallway. Quietly, so that Minhyuk wouldn’t hear, Jooheon prodded his co-pilot, “Why won’t you let me take you to the medical bay? You need it.”

Changkyun let out a labored sigh. “I don’t want them looking at me.”

“We can ask for Kihyunie. You trust his hands, don’t you?”

Weakly, the younger boy shook his head. “You know, I told you earlier that Kihyun was pitying me? Everyone there looks at me like that. I don’t want to go.”

Right about that time, they reached the drivesuit room and Minhyuk turned to help them. Jooheon motioned that his co-pilot should get help first. Minhyuk only nodded and settled Changkyun down into a chair. In no time his slender, deft fingers had pulled the release. After that, the circuitry suit zipper only needed to be undone before he could slide out of the battle armor. 

Soon enough Jooheon was out, too, leaving both boys in underwear only. Changkyun tried getting into habit, but his best friend stopped him and gently pried the clothes from his hands, handing him a different set instead.

If anyone saw them as they went back to their room, no one interrupted. Jooheon wondered if it was a funny sight: one chubby cheeked boy in uniform, carrying another on his shoulders. The passenger wasn’t in uniform but instead in a pair of athletic shorts and a hole-ridden tee shirt. His arms and legs wrapped around the other, and his eyes drooped closed involuntarily.

Jooheon could feel Changkyun’s thoughts blank in and out as he succumbed to a mixture of pain and exhaustion. At long last he could set his co-pilot down in his bed. Jooheon pulled the sheets over the younger boy, and sat there a minute to rub his forehead before Changkyun’s consciousness flicked off for good.

 

* * *

 

The two pilots slept for a long time, and woke up feeling at least better about the kill they had managed to pull off. After that, a couple of days passed slowly. Changkyun still had excruciating pain, but the day-to-day routine they resumed, packed full of training, conditioning, and downtimes with friends, made it not as bad.

Jooheon couldn’t help worrying constantly about his best friend. He had never considered himself to be an anxious person, but now that Changkyun was struggling to live normally, he found that it was so easy to get that nauseous feeling at the thought of how sad and in pain the younger boy was. It ate at Jooheon. All he could do to keep himself level was stick to his own routine.

One evening, Jooheon returned to their bunk around six pm to discover that Changkyun wasn’t there. He hadn’t seen him in any of the usual places, so he had assumed the younger boy had already returned here. Jooheon’s stomach dropped, but he somehow managed to convince himself that it wasn’t reason to worry. Faintly, he remembered that Kihyun had called Changkyun back and asked him if he would be willing to meet for an appointment at five. Of course, Kyunie had agreed, and that was probably where he was now.

Changing into some comfy jeans and a black tee, Jooheon lounged at his desk. Taking out some clamps and screwdrivers, he busied himself in pulling apart a blender that he had found abandoned in a hallway. Many people in the shatterdome knew Jooheon’s talent for mechanics and so trusted him with various repairs. After realizing that he was being called on more and more, he started charging a small fee for his services. He also picked up appliances sometimes and worked on them, cleaning them for resale or personal use. The almost-mindless work kept his brain occupied and wiped away the stress of the day. 

The next time Jooheon looked up, the digital clock on the wall said 11:00, and the ranger’s eyes widened.

His next thought was the realization that Changkyun still wasn’t back. If he was going to sleep tonight, he would have been here long ago. Instantly, Jooheon knew where he would more than likely be. He still went out to the lake lots of times. Often Jooheon would let him have his peace, but considering that Kyunie had met with Kihyun today…a feeling deep in the pit of the older boy’s stomach urged him to go.

So minutes later, Jooheon found himself out in the night air, hands in pockets, wandering out to the water’s edge. It was a nice evening, but for some reason the wind chilled him more than normal. 

Changkyun was sitting in his usual spot: on the dock, both feet over the edge, motionless. So motionless in fact that Jooheon wondered for a moment if he was asleep. But as he heard his hyung’s footsteps approach, the younger boy turned his head to see who was there and tried his hardest to smile. 

With a jolt, Jooheon realized that his best friend was paler than the moonlight that shone down on him. The chubby-cheeked ranger plopped down next to Changkyun, their hips pressed together, body heat warming each other up. 

For a moment, sitting like this, neither spoke. 

“Is it your head again?”

Changkyun smiled weakly and laughed a little. “It’s always my head.” giving the tiniest hint of a sly grin, he lifted his hand and tapped the usual spot. “Right there.”

Jooheon didn’t have the heart to continue on. Nor did he know how to. Another long moment of silence reigned, expectant silence, unsure silence.

“Jooheonie, I’m dying.”


	2. Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Changkyun reveals that he has a cancerous tumor growing in the back of his head, explaining his recent onslaught of headaches. He's declined treatment, instead wanting to spend the rest of his life normally, and jockeying in Blind Rhythm with Jooheon. Of course, the older ranger is angry, but that melts away as Changkyun also confesses his love.

The news made Jooheon jump, and a numb feeling overwhelmed him. Eyes snapping open as wide as they could go, he glanced over at Changkyun, sullen and sulking. “Dying? Who told you that?”

The younger boy chuckled, a low, mirthless sound that didn’t help Jooheon’s mood at all. “Well–no one, but Kihyun might as well have told me.” He sighed before continuing, “I have a tumor about the size of a tangerine in the back of my head. Though we don’t know yet, he’s pretty sure that it’s malignant, given its placement and that it’s growing.”

A large part of the older ranger didn’t want to believe this was happening. Though he heard and understood, and his brow was already wrinkling in worry, he didn’t yet grasp the depth of what Changkyun was saying. His mind was too busy trying to make something else out of it. “Malignant…that means cancer?”

Changkyun nodded sadly, kicking at the water below.

Jooheon’s felt his hope slip away, mind racing. It took all he had to not blubber too badly. “B–but, how? And you’re so calm about it! You’re only twenty-one–why–why is this happening to you of all people?”

“Kihyun told me that I had the tumor before I joined the PPDC, perhaps even before that. It could have been benign at the earliest stages. But cancer cells started growing when I got exposed to radioactivity–”

“From Blind Rhythm’s nuclear core.”

“Exactly.”

Jooheon choked. Though he was holding it together on the outside, inside he was a mess, angry and sad and scared all at the same time. It was silly, but the thought flashed through his head that he was more terrified by this news than he was at the thought of fighting kaiju. He just didn’t think about the potential negative consequences of stepping into a Jaeger. Now his co-pilot and best friend was sick, potentially dying, not because of the monster but because of the warrior. “…Surgery?”

“Kihyun told me that it’s too close to my spinal column to operate on. Um, it’s also probably stage three or four at this point…too late to do anything about it now.”

“Well–I mean come on, there’s gotta be an option for chemotherapy, radiation, something, right? What did he say about that?”

Changkyun dropped his head in shame and turned away. “I–I told him that I didn’t want to do anything about it."

A rush of red-hot anger coursed through Jooheon. Mainly, it was at himself. He should have made Changkyun go to the doctor before; seen the signs; spent more time with him. Of course, he was being stubborn, too, and that made the older boy worried and livid. “You refused treatment? Why did you do such a _fucking_ stupid thing? You’d never run from a Kaiju, so why are you running from being sick?”

Changkyun cut into the conversation with as much intensity as he could muster amongst his pain. He was one of the few people who didn’t wilt at Jooheon’s scary demeanor. Many more important and more brave people did. “That’s just it, if I went ahead with treatment, I wouldn’t be able to do what I want to with the rest of my life.”

“And what might that be, smarty-pants? What could possibly be so important that you leave yourself in pain and shorten your life? Don’t make stupid decisions, Changkyunie–”

Then the younger boy was pulling close, and a soft pair of lips pressed into Jooheon’s, silencing him. It was a desperate gesture, almost like how a dry, parched man kissed water. Wrinkles appeared between Kyun’s eyebrows as they knit together, and he pulled nervously on his hyung’s sleeve. The moment seemed long, but almost as quickly as it happened, it ended. They both flushed deep red as they pulled away.

Jooheon came away with his system shocked into silence, and he sat there for a moment, flabbergasted and slack-jawed. So that was why he had always sensed deep love and adoration from Changkyun in the drift; before now, it wasn’t particularly obvious who it was for. Eventually, the corners of his mouth tipped up. “Seriously?”

“W–well, yeah.” Changkyun dropped his gaze. “Forgive me. I’m sorry.”

“Wait, wait. Hold on a second. Don’t go apologizing yet.”

This time, Kyun was the one who glanced up to find lips waiting. They shared a brief kiss, outside hands finding each other, fingers weaving together.

“We can spend the rest of your life together.” Jooheon whispered at last, brushing his thumb down Changkyun’s palm. A smile engulfed the younger boy’s face, the likes of which Jooheon hadn’t seen for many, many months. It made his heart flutter. “Just tell me why you don’t want more time.”

“Because–I want to keep fighting alongside you, too. I know that nothing makes you happier than being in Blind Rhythm, though those freaky kaiju are scary as shit. If I start treatment, I’ll be too weak. I’ve been managing pain fine. I can take it if it means I pilot a few more missions.”

For the second time that night, the older ranger was at a total loss for words. It felt selfish to want to keep pushing themselves into the fray, with this fresh knowledge of Changkyun’s condition. Yet, if that was what his best friend really desired, he wouldn’t argue. Kyun had to make his own choices, and Jooheon would respect them, whatever they were. Also, he was right. If everyone knew that he was being treated for cancer, no one would let him near the Jaeger. So, in the end, not knowing what else to do, Jooheon simply nodded and swallowed the lump in his throat.

Changkyun leaned his head against his best friend’s shoulder, a content sigh escaping his lips. “I love you, Jooheonie. If I would have known you felt the same way, I would have told you long ago. I really hope that this isn’t a dream.”

“You should kiss me again, then, and maybe we’ll find out.”

Shy, excited smiles spread across their faces, and Changkyun did. There, on the dock, the two relished in the taste of each other. Arms snaked around shoulders and waists. When they opened their eyes again, they were still close, under the moonlight. Jooheon pulled Changkyun into his lap, nuzzling into his best friend’s neck. One hand on his hyung’s thigh, the other around his shoulders, the younger boy was content as well. For a while, they sat there tangled together, not speaking but always understanding.

Then Changkyun yawned. Of course Jooheon noticed and stroked his back. "Time to get you into bed, huh?”

At Kyun’s sleepy nod, Jooheon carefully backed up from the edge of the dock and with a heave, picked them both up. Changkyun gave a gasp of surprise, tensing his hold on his co-pilot’s shoulders. Momentarily, Jooheon put him back on his feet.

While they were still there, close, fingers intertwined, Changkyun asked lowly: "Jooheonie, would you come to bed with me tonight? I’ve been having trouble sleeping, and I’d love your warmth.”

“Whatever you’d like, my prince.” Of course this made the younger boy blush.

Then they walked back to the compound, side by side. If anyone noticed them stealing swift, tender glances and smiling bashfully at each other, no one said anything.

Soon it was back in the familiarity of their shared room. As the door closed behind them, they were once more up in each other’s arms. They felt like they had to make up for lost time, and yet both didn’t want to rush anything. It was just slow making out for a while, until they parted to climb into pajamas. For Jooheon, that was simply shedding his shirt and shoes. Changkyun had some shorts and a tee shirt he preferred; both had been the elder’s at one point. (Often, when Jooheon had clothing he didn’t want anymore, Changkyun took it. Secretly, he liked wearing hand-me-downs. It made him feel closer to his hyung.)

Trying to fit into the small bottom bunk together was a mess. There were a lot of chuckles and more kisses before they found a comfortable spot. Changkyun was grateful that he was slightly smaller, since Jooheon’s thickness took up a lot of room. In the end, the latter snuggled into the former’s back, and they fell asleep, content. Pressed together closely, it was easy to forget about everything beyond their four walls. Also, that terrible diagnosis that weighed them down.

 

* * *

 

The next morning, Jooheon woke up to find himself the only one in bed, but not alone. Changkyun sat right by on the floor, back to the mattress, leaning up against the bedframe. Curious, the older ranger slid himself to the edge and watched him in silence.

A Game Boy Color lay at Kyunie’s side, ported into his laptop via an adapter. It was his own personal console, but the game cartridge inside wasn’t. With skilled, deft fingers he furiously typed out lengths of code. These were unintelligible to Jooheon’s brain, but they clearly meant something to Changkyun. Every once in a while, the younger boy would go and check the game, and a texture or an event would change. 

Changkyun concentrating had always been one of Jooheon’s favorite things. There was the little scrunch between his eyebrows, which never failed to be cute. Another telltale sign was his mouth pressed flat into a line, which made his dimples appear prominently. If Jooheon hadn’t known that it was not a good idea to interrupt him, he would have been planting kisses on those cheeks.

Finally Changkyun let out a long breath, setting aside the computer and stretching. Jooheon took that moment to run his hand through his boyfriend’s locks. “Good morning, Kyunie.”

“Good morning.”

“You feeling alright?”

“No. Still waiting for the damn painkillers to kick in though. Should be any minute now.”

“I’m sorry, baby.” Jooheon frowned with worry, and wrapping his arms around Changkyun’s neck, rubbed his chest. The small, soothing circles had the younger ranger’s breathing slowing in no time. "Hm, what are you doing with that?“ Jooheon asked, gesturing to the tech work.

"Reprogramming the cartridge. Hopefully after I’m done, the game will be better quality and a bit harder. The original is one of my big brother’s favorites. It’ll be a bit of a birthday present.” Changkyun smiled, satisfied.

Of course it would be something for his family. Jooheon’s heart grew five sizes and yet started to ache. Sometimes he wished that he could be half the man his co-pilot was. Changkyun was a sensitive and thoughtful kid. He loved doing nice things for people, especially his family, whom he had always been close to, in particular his mother.

The older, taller ranger, on the other hand–the only one he had left was his dad, who he hadn’t spoken to in years. They had a falling out right before Jooheon joined the military, and been in an extreme state of estrangement ever since. Jooheon considered his friends in the shatterdome to be his family, though. That was better than nothing, anyway, hey?

He almost didn’t catch it when Changkyun said, under his breath, “Would it be too much to ask if we can visit my family before–before, you know–?”

Jooheon sighed at what he was implying. Before you die. “I don’t see why not. We’ll just have to request some time off.”

At this, the most precious grin grew on the younger ranger’s face. Weak for that bright smile, a matching one enveloped the older ranger’s as well. Still stroking Changkyun’s hair, Jooheon purred, “Kyunie, how about a date tonight, hmm? If you’re feeling up to it, of course.”

“What kind of date? It better not be like what Wonho put Kihyun through the other day.” The ibuprofen must be kicking in; Changkyun was regaining his usual, playfully snarky attitude. He craned his neck around to gaze at Jooheon.

“Oh, Gods. What did Hoseok do to that poor guy?”

“Took him to a build-your-own stuffed animal shop.”

“Hey–! That’s not too bad. Some of those places are kind of nice, and I think it’d be romantic to make one for your other and exchange them at the end–”

Changkyun smacked Jooheon on the arm. “This was the one downtown, the _pink_ one. Kihyunie said that there were a million little girls in there when they were.”

“Oh. Well, I bet he enjoyed it more than he let on. Are those two actually dating yet?”

“In the doctor’s own words, _‘After that, I’m sticking to being his lover, not his boyfriend’_.”

Ah, man. Jooheon chuckled and shook his head. “Well, you have nothing like that to fear from me. Right now I’m trying to decide where I should take you for dinner. What do you think? Does the Rio sound alright to you?”

“Of course.” The Rio was a wonderful restaurant, expensive but an incredible experience. You had to make a reservation as well as dress up in fancy suits and ties, but it was all worth it for the world class food and service.

“Then that’s what we’ll do.” Jooheon ruffled Changkyun’s hair again. “Ok, I need to hit the KWOON for a while. Better get up and around.” As he climbed out of bed, their lips brushed for a moment in a quick kiss before the older boy was off to the bathroom.

 

* * *

 

Later, after their day was over and everything had settled down, they headed out, hand in hand, dressed to the nines. Jooheon was in his best black silk suit and Changkyun in tweed. Upon first seeing each other like that, Jooheon’s jaw had slackened, eyes widening. An involuntary damn had escaped, too.

_(“Do I look that good?” Changkyun had glanced up from his phone, smirking. Then he had proceeded to make a face so meme-worthy that Jooheon couldn’t help but break out into raucous laughter._

_“Not anymore.” The older boy waited for Changkyun’s dimples to appear before he hooked an arm around his waist and wrapped him in a close hug. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding. Ah, I love you. And yes, you look that good.”)_

For some reason, ever since he suggested the Rio that morning, Jooheon had become determined to make Changkyun feel a true prince for one night. It even happened that somehow, he had convinced Marshal Hyunwoo to lend him the Maserati. That in itself was a miracle, as the Marshal was normally very protective of his slick sports car. Jooheon had a feeling that the only reason he had agreed was because of Changkyun. Perhaps, also, the underlying urgency of the request.

Even for Jooheon, a thrill seeker, it took some time to get used to. So, he had taken it out for a street spin earlier in the day. The sheer power of the car was daunting at first. The older boy felt plain and out of place in the fancy set of wheels. He had to constantly remind himself to relax and resist the urge to speed and clam up at the low purr of the engine.

Now, as streetlamps flashed by, Jooheon couldn’t help but look over at Changkyun every once in a while. He really did seem like royalty tonight, legs crossed neatly over one another in the passenger’s seat. One hand draped lazily over the console, while the other propped his chin up as he stared out the window. Besides his sharp suit, he had parted and styled up his hair a little, which truly was a beautiful sight. Jooheon kept feeling flashes of pride at having him all to himself.

 

* * *

 

The Rio was a fancier affair than anything they had ever done together. Jooheon felt out of place. He was honestly more of a burger and pizza joint or street Jajangmyeon vendor guy, himself. Changkyun seemed comfortable, however, so the older boy did his best to seem at ease as well. A valet was waiting to take the car as they stepped out, and Jooheon hesitantly handed over the keys. He probably had nothing to fear, but if something happened to the high-dollar vehicle, Hyunwoo would have his ass.

He went to meet Changkyun, who was waiting on the other side of the car, and together they wandered inside. It was hard, but they knew they needed to resist the urge to hold hands, at least for now. They still had a public image to maintain, even if they didn’t have much time. Jooheon flashed his ID to the person at the counter to prove that he really was who he said. Then the waiter led them over to a private booth (one of the many perks of being a protector of the city) and took their order.

Once he had left, Jooheon reached across the table and took Changkyun’s hand, lacing their fingers together. He was really trying not to think of anything except the evening, and how good Changkyun looked in his suit. Honestly, it was harder than he figured it would be. He found a question slipping out of his mouth that he had intended to ask later, but that somehow had overtaken him.

“Baby, I hate to potentially spoil a worry free night, but I was wondering. Do you have anything that you absolutely have to do or experience before the cancer claims you? Other than visit your family, that is?”

“Jooheon–no night from here until the end is going to be worry free.”

The older boy’s eyebrows knit together in determination. “Well, I’m going to try as hard as I can. If I had the whole world, I’d give it all away so that I could see you happy for a moment of time.”

Changkyun’s face fell, and he nodded curtly. “You have no idea how much that means to me.” His lungs filled with a single, deep breath. When he rubbed his eye, the side of his hand got coated with wet, which he quickly wiped on his pant leg. “As for my bucket list, um–I haven’t really thought of anything yet. But I’ll think about it, ok?”

“Of course. Just say the word, and I can get it arranged.”

“For both of us?”

“If at all possible.” Jooheon smiled and rubbed his thumb gently across Changkyun’s knuckles, then brought it up to his lips to give it a kiss. The corners of the younger boy’s mouth tipped up at this, and he glowed, shy again suddenly. He rested his head in his folded palm, eyes trained on a painting above their heads. That faraway look he had in the car earlier clouded his eyes.

A moment of silence passed. Then, unexpectedly, Changkyun brightened, gaze snapping back to Jooheon’s. The older ranger almost instantly knew that he was in trouble as the most mischievous smile crossed his boyfriend’s face. “Hey, what if I wanted find out once and for all if H.One and the Marshal are in cahoots?”

 _Not this again._ Was he always going to bring it up? Seriously, it wasn’t that big of a deal. Jooheon guffawed and leaned back in the chair. Yes, 514-H and the Marshal’s strange schedule were vastly interesting. It didn’t mean that he was hiding something as big as romancing a wanted criminal, though. “You know that I borrowed Hyunwoo’s Maserati, right?”

“Really? I totally thought that you had your own.” Kyunie rolled his eyes. “Yes, I am perfectly aware.”

“I’ve already spent my favors. How would I ask him something like that anyway? Just casually hand him his keys back and be like, ‘Oh yeah, Marshal, Changkyun wants to know if you’ve ever fucked the most wanted man in South Korea.’ Um, no. You’re the one who desperately wants to know, ask him yourself.”

Changkyun’s bottom lip poked out. He was good at using his still slightly wet eyes to his advantage. “Jooheonie, but–I’m a wittle baby, waah–”

“Jesus Christ, you can still pilot a Jaeger. Asking a simple question is not out of your capabilities either.” Jooheon went to shoot Changkyun a snide look across the table. However, he abruptly froze at the playful smile that greeted him. “– _what?_ ”

“You’re so handsome when you’re annoyed.” The younger boy’s eyes flashed with lust. From the moment he saw it, Jooheon knew that it was a dangerous gaze. Butterflies exploded in his stomach, and he had to fight back a blush. Slowly, another familiar feeling took over, as well–his own desire. Keeping his composure was hard now, as his resolve and self control melted fast.

“You’re just saying that to get me to ask for you.” 

“Nope. I’m serious. I like seeing your face when you’ve had enough of me and my supposed H.woo bullshit.”

 _The fuck?_ Where had the kind, caring boyfriend of just a few seconds ago gone? More than that, what was up with this ugly conversation? “Did–did you just give them a couple name?”

“Not just. They had one a long time ago, actually. Isn’t it cute? H.woo?”

“No, not at all. Changkyun, you’re always coming up with these things, and it’s so stupid, yeah it’s bullshit. You totally don’t get it.”

With every frustrated word that flew from Jooheon’s mouth, Changkyun’s eyes were getting darker. It was infuriating to no end–but also a huge turn-on. “Fuck.” his already-low voice had somehow dropped three octaves. “You’re so hot.”

Five minutes later, the waiter came back, food in hand, to find a twenty-five dollar tip and an empty table.

 

* * *

 

Changkyun practically pulled them through the front doors of the restaurant and up the ramp to the parking garage. Jooheon could barely keep up, and it didn’t help that he was suddenly weak in the knees. Somehow, he managed to muscle his way past to claim the keys to the Maserati. The valet didn’t question or act disappointed in their all-too-brief stay. He simply started to lead them toward where he had parked the car.

They were just at the bottom of the stairs, through the doorway to the lowest, premium parking level, when Changkyun grinned and swung around suddenly. Right there, in public, feet behind the clueless valet–he grabbed Jooheon by the shirt collar and pulled him in for a hungry kiss. That wasn’t all, though, because he also unashamedly groped him. Jooheon was helpless against the moan that left his mouth. The flush pink of Changkyun’s lips stopped it for the most part.

“Hm, I suspected, baby,” Changkyun murmured hotly into his ear and pressed their hips together. The older ranger felt something against his thigh. “Don’t worry. I’m just as hard as you are.”

“Fuck–Kyunie–” But Changkyun was moving on, catching up to the valet.

Then Jooheon saw a flash of silver and black, and his eyes snapped open when he realized what had just also happened: Changkyun had stolen the keys to the car out of his pants pocket. Incredulity ripped through him. Really, where had this side come from? He hadn’t seen it before, even when Kyun was drunk. Jooheon wouldn’t easily admit it, but he found it to be kind of refreshing.

Not like the younger boy wasn’t right. He was already whipped and dripping for him.

“I told Hyunwoo that I’d drive!” Jooheon tried to protest as he caught up.

“Well he doesn’t have to know, now does he?” The look Changkyun gave him made it dangerously clear that argue any more would be futile. So, admitting defeat for the moment, Jooheon walked to the passenger’s seat of the sports car and slid in. As soon as Changkyun closed his door, the Maserati roared to life, and he threw the shift into reverse. The valet barely had time to get out of the way before the car peeled out of the lot.

The younger boy was a good driver, though reckless. This powerful ride was a treat he had no doubt wanted to experience. At the rate they were going, and how they swung around corners at crazy speeds, honestly it was a miracle they didn’t see any cops. Halfway through the ride Jooheon realized that they definitely weren’t heading in the direction of base. “Kyun–”

Cue another wilt-inducing, dangerous glance. They had been in each other’s heads enough for the older boy to know what it meant: _don’t question me, I know what I’m doing._

 

* * *

 

Finally Changkyun took a turn-off. A few more twisting streets later, they arrived at what the older ranger could only guess was their destination. It was a small but quaint motel, with paint fading off the shutters to the rooms and a roof that needed re-shingling. Some cars sat in the lot, but for the most part everything was quiet and empty. Jooheon shot Changkyun an inquisitive glance, but he didn’t answer, of course. Almost immediately, Kyun headed for the parking spot in front of door number twenty-six, on the end of the row.

At this point, they didn’t give a single fuck if anyone was watching in the dim glow of the moon. So, as soon as they were out of the Maserati and could make physical contact, they were all over each other. Changkyun pulled them to the door to the room and took a key out of his pocket. Fiddling with the knob, soon he had it open and they were falling into the dark room. The door barely had a chance to close behind them before their shoes were off, and lips locked together. Tongues danced and curled without hesitation. They were both already so needy, and it drove them on.

Now the power balance shifted, and Jooheon’s dominant side came full force to the surface. He could feel the tingles of expectation run down the younger boy’s spine as he pressed him against the wall by the doorframe. Mercilessly, Jooheon bucked his hips up into him. “You think you can get away with being a pain in the ass tonight, huh? Telling me I’m sexy when I’m pissed off at you? Teasing me in front of that poor valet, stealing the keys to the car?” His mouth roamed from Changkyun’s lips, to his jaw and neck, sucking hickeys in the younger’s tender skin.

“I–I’m sorry,” Kyun gasped, involuntarily squeezing Jooheon closer. “I’ve been half-hard for you all night. I wasn’t sure h–how much longer I’d be able to keep my hands off–in the Rio– _fuck_ , you’re so hot when you’re angry.” The older boy felt trembling but soft hands slide his suit coat off, and fumble with the buttons on his shirt. If this had been anyone else, he might have stopped Changkyun, and been a bit more domineering. However, he had a soft spot in his heart for his boyfriend, and so allowed it. He even flexed his shoulders to help get rid of the uncomfortable, starched cotton top once and for all.

Then Changkyun’s wandering fingers were all over, exploring Jooheon’s well-knit, muscular torso. Goosebumps rose in their wake. Almost without realizing it, the older ranger compensated by pushing his tongue deeper in his best friend’s mouth. The attention made the flame in his breast burn hotter. Within minutes, Changkyun was in the same state, half-naked and vulnerable.

Jooheon carried him tenderly over to the king bed, laying him down and straddling him. Changkyun placed a hand on his boyfriend’s abs, but Jooheon grabbed his wrist before he could do anything else. More specifically, undo the button of his dress pants.

But, with his other hand, the older boy undid Changkyun’s belt and popped the clasp of his trousers. Kissing down the length of his body, he hooked his fingers in the waistband of his underwear and smoothly pulled the cloth clean off.

It wasn’t like they hadn’t seen each other naked before, but Jooheon was always taken aback by the size of his co-pilot’s cock. It was especially impressive now as it sprung up, red, hard, and leaking. Jooheon took the needy length in his hand with a little grin of victory. Using his thumb to collect and slick down precum, he started to pump. One glance back up told him everything he needed to know. Changkyun’s adam’s apple bobbed, head thrown back.

“Damn, I don’t even have to have you in my mouth to get you to come undone.”

“Ah–but please, w–would you do it?” Changkyun managed to gasp. “ _God_ , do you have any idea how many times I’ve dreamed about having those pretty lips of yours wrapped around my cock?”

“Wow. You’re naughtier than I thought.” Jooheon smirked and slowed down, but honestly it took all he had. His mouth was already starting to water and God, his dick–he was so hard, too.

“Don’t–” Changkyun started to complain, but the older ranger cut him off with a tut.

“Now now, patience is a virtue, hm?” With that, he let Changkyun’s hard length flop against his belly, and crawled back up to kiss him again. Guiding the younger boy’s hands down, he allowed him to undress him the rest of the way. This left both nearly naked in front of each other.

Jooheon’s manhood wasn’t quite as long as his boyfriend’s, but had similar girth, perhaps even more. Changkyun took hold, and Jooheon bucked into his hand, doing most of the work himself. “Fuck, Changkyun, you’re sin.”

“And you– _ah_ –you make me go crazy.”

They remained there for a long while, Kyun thrusting into the air too, by second nature, as he helped his best friend get off. Little, sloppy pools of warm precum formed on the younger’s belly, as his own mingled with Jooheon’s. By now their lips were swollen from so many kisses, and red and purple hickeys lined their necks. Jooheon was enjoying his boyfriend’s touch so much that for a while he forgot about everything else.

But then Changkyun asked hesitantly, “Baby–when can I have that blowjob–? You never told me no.”

“I’ll give it to you now, if you’ll let me dictate what happens after that.” Changkyun nodded vigorously. Jooheon remembered his confession earlier and shivered with anticipation. “Ok, edge of the bed then.”

They both immediately switched position. Jooheon crawled down onto his knees, on the floor, and Changkyun obeyed the older boy’s wishes, legs hanging off the mattress. This let Jooheon have access to Kyun’s cock without much strain. Somehow, his length was even more red and angry than before.

“I’m sorry, baby, let me take care of that.” Jooheon drew the saliva in his mouth onto his tongue. Taking Changkyun in hand he gave him a nice, wet lick up the front side, following the main vein, balls to tip. The younger boy shuddered in pleasure, hands gripping the bedsheets as Jooheon pumped a couple times, to spread the moisture around, and finally took him in his mouth.

“Fuuck,” Changkyun groaned, goosebumps breaking out on his skin. That low voice had always made Jooheon weak, and now it was especially deep. When he glanced up, he found that Kyun was watching him with a dark light in his eyes, and that he was biting his lip. One of his hands came down to bury itself in Jooheon’s hair.

Jooheon had to forcibly restrain Changkyun from humping his mouth as he bobbed up and down. It was enough as it was to try to get more in without the help of Changkyun’s hips. Like a true pro, the older boy stroked the vein and tip with his tongue on every pass. Soon enough Changkyun was a panting mess, beads of sweat slicking his hair and feeling like he was about to explode. “J–Jooheonie–”

With a final twist of his hips, Changkyun was cumming. The force finally overpowered Jooheon’s grip. At the moment’s notice, somehow Jooheon managed to relax. The whole of the younger’s length pushed into his mouth. Sticky, salty white semen flowed down his throat. He might have flinched, but he didn’t pull away; the feeling of his swallowing sent shivers back through Changkyun’s body.

Finally, when Jooheon couldn’t take the burning lack of oxygen anymore and his boyfriend seemed to be out of cum, he pulled off, lips parting from Changkyun’s tip with a lewd, wet pop.

But Jooheon was still hard, and Changkyun had promised him that he could call the shots now. He got up, growling, unfazed by Changkyun’s fresh load in his stomach. Out of his pants, which were still around his knees, Jooheon pulled lube and a condom. Then he shed them the rest of the way. For a moment, Changkyun stared at this new development.

“What did I say earlier? Yours off, too.” At this, Changkyun scrambled to push the fabric off his body. “Hands and knees, dirty boy.” Jooheon popped open the top of the small tube and coated his fingers, then climbed back up beside his boyfriend.

Changkyun once again obeyed without hesitation, spreading his legs a little and lifting his ass into the air. As soon as Jooheon touched the cold, slick gel to the rim of his anus, the younger boy inhaled sharply. Then Jooheon stuck a digit in, pushing the lube deeper and dipping in and out. “That feels good, huh?” Despite the older boy’s forceful attitude, the question was thinly veiled care. If Changkyun gave any hint that he was uncomfortable, they would stop.

“Y–yes.”

Adding another digit and giving Changkyun a minute to adjust, Jooheon decided that it was ok to put in his ring finger too. Changkyun shuddered underneath him. Jooheon brushed his prostate once, and that made him fist his hands in the sheets again.

Not too long after that, the older boy murmured, “Ready, baby?”

Changkyun nodded.

Tearing open the condom, Jooheon rolled it on and hoped that his murmured advice would be enough. “Ok. Just relax.” Then he pushed his dick in, slowly, all the while rubbing Changkyun’s hipbones with his hands. “That’s it. Perfect.” Changkyun hummed and sighed at the feeling of his hyung filling him up. Jooheon started to move, and sloppy moans fell from his mouth.

Changkyun swore, gasping. “Babe, I’m so hard again.”

The older boy took great pleasure in that he was wrecking his boyfriend for the second time tonight. “Ah yeah? Then touch yourself for me, dirty boy.”

Shifting his weight as best he could, Changkyun leaned on one side and reaching his newly-freed hand back to tug at his cock. Jooheon was still pounding into his ass, roughly now. The younger boy was so tight around him.

It didn’t take long until Jooheon was struggling to hold back an orgasm. “Kyunie, I’m so close…”

“Give it to me.” The beg pierced through the rush of blood in Jooheon’s ears and the sound of their skin slapping together. Changkyun was rutting his hips into his lover now. It was as if he sensed that Jooheon needed help keeping the desperate pace. “Give me all your cum.”

Jooheon’s vision tunneled, then snapped into full scope again. Pleasure ripped through his body like a tidal wave. His dick pulsed against Changkyun’s insides, and he couldn’t help but shoot his entire load into the condom. Finally he was falling forward onto his boyfriend’s back. Both were panting heavily, spent.

Tiredness overwhelmed them after all that, but Changkyun whined softly. Jooheon couldn’t ignore it; he had to finish this–or rather, finish Kyun off. So, the elder ranger summoned his remaining strength. After carefully pulling out and sitting up, he hooked an arm around Changkyun’s waist, bringing him flush to himself. Jooheon left light, dusting kisses along his neck and behind his ear, and reached around with his other hand to help jack him off.

Changkyun fell limp, eyes fluttering shut. Meanwhile, Jooheon murmured sweet nothings in his ear. “You’re so sexy, baby. It makes me proud that you’re all mine.” A small smile grew on the younger boy’s face. “I want you like this so many more times.”

“Me, too.” They met in an open-mouthed, wet, sloppy kiss.

Jooheon could tell when his boyfriend was close, which he was again. “Get your hand up there, Changkyunie.”

The younger sighed at the gentle reminder, and cupped his tip with his right hand. Seconds later, he was spilling there, orgasm touching him again, moans falling out of his mouth. Jooheon’s slow pumps coaxed all the white frothy cum out of him. A few drops fell onto the comforter, settling there on the surface.

 

* * *

 

Both pilots sat there for a moment, trying to calm their breathing and simply enjoying the lingering warmth. At long last, Changkyun crawled forward, careful not to tip his palm too much. There was a box of tissues sitting on the nightstand, and he grabbed a couple to wipe his hand. Once he had gotten everything, including what had slipped between his fingers, he turned his attention to the bed, mopping up the mess they had made there as well.

Jooheon pulled off the full condom still on his length. In only a few seconds he tied it off and deposited it in a convenient trash can. “If you want, you can shower first, Kyunie.”

The younger boy nodded. “Ok.” They stopped one more time to kiss briefly. Then Changkyun disappeared through the doorway to the bathroom.

 _Ah, man, this is the dream,_ Jooheon thought as he got up to wander around the room. He pulled on his briefs before gathering the rest of their clothes, too, folding them as best as he knew how and placing them on the dresser by the TV. Then it was back to the bed, on his back, drumming his fingers on his stomach and listening to the shower run.

_One that isn’t going to last._

Immediately, he rebuked the thought. _Bullshit. I have the opportunity to spend as much time as possible with him now._ Changkyun… the younger boy found solace in his co-pilot, considering him to be a rock amongst the ever-shifting tides of the world. _He really wants to be with me, physically, sexually–mentally. That’s the part of it that’s the dream._

It was in that moment that a revelation came over Jooheon. He had been so caught up in asking Changkyun about last wishes and desires, that he hadn’t even thought about his own. Really, the only thing Jooheon wanted was to fight the Kaiju until their end with Changkyun at his side.

Suddenly, he burned with the desire to make that a reality.

 

* * *

 

Soon enough Changkyun came out with a towel wrapped around his waist. He was grinning in that cute, mischievous way again, and he didn’t hesitate to start teasing his hyung. “Man, you should see it in there. Whoever stays here keeps it fully stocked. There’s three kinds of shampoo in the shower, ibuprofen, even toothbrushes and toothpaste. Maybe if you brush your teeth before you come to bed, your breath won’t reek so bad.”

“Shut up, you know that’s your fault,” Banter game strong as ever, Jooheon jabbed back at him playfully and laughed. “but wait, if you don’t know who uses the room, how did you come across this place?”

"I dunno.” Giving a shrug, the younger boy went over to his pile of clothes and grabbed his boxers. Jooheon trailed his gaze over his boyfriend’s body as he hopped into them. “I found a key on the floor one time, and it looked interesting, so I picked it up. Tried it on doors in the Shatterdome. Didn’t work. So I gave it to a buddy of mine, and he did a little digging. Turns out it was to this room. I can’t explain why or how. I thought I’d keep it just in case I needed it, and look at this. We did.”

“That’s weird. A good find, but weird.” Giving a sigh, the older ranger flexed his shoulders. “So, are you done in there?”

“Yeah.”

 

* * *

 

The hot water felt so nice against Jooheon’s skin. In choosing a shampoo, it intrigued him that the three bottles were so different. The one he went ahead and used had a manly, musky scent, closest to the one he used every day. For some reason, it made him think of the Marshal, too. The other two were light and cottony and fruity and zesty, respectively; the latter also reminded him of someone, but he couldn’t put a finger on it. Jooheon did his best to swirl the extra suds over his body, since there seemed to be no wash in there. Changkyun was right about it being well-stocked, it seemed, except for that.When he was out of the shower, Jooheon decided to take Kyun’s advice and brush his teeth. Thank goodness that there was a brush still in the package on top of the mirror. Then he pulled his underwear back on and went to rejoin his boyfriend.

Changkyun wasn’t wearing his suit, much to Jooheon’s surprise. He looked pretty comfortable in a random pair of jeans and dark tee shirt, busily tapping away on his phone. There was also a set of clothes on the bed next to him. Changkyun gave him a smile as he approached, and patted the jeans and shirt by his side. “So, I was looking through the drawers in here. Just so happens that like in the shower, three people have clothes. One is my size, one is yours, and the third must be someone tall and lanky.”

Jooheon’s eyebrows went up, and he let out a hum, checking the tag on the jeans. Yes, they were a perfect fit. Changkyun knew him all too well.

“There’s also like, fifteen boxes of condoms and at least ten tubes of lube stashed around here too. And then some sex toys I’ve never even dreamed of before. I wonder what this place is anyway. A love cave?”

“I don’t think I’m surprised,” Jooheon said half-absentmindedly as he slid into the outfit and hopped onto the bed next to his boyfriend. “I wonder who though? It’s someone who works at the Shatterdome.”

“Well, of course. But that’s all we have.”

“What was the general location of the key?”

“Well–” Changkyun scratched his chin. “It was kind of in the general vicinity of LOCCENT? I was walking between the bunks and there when I saw it.”

“Weird.”

Conversation died down after that; both pilots were content to hold each other in the darkness, smiling and sighing, a few kisses placed here and there.

And then Changkyun’s stomach grumbled.

It dawned on the older boy that neither of them had touched food since lunch (swallowing Changkyun’s cock and cum did not count), and he sucked in a breath. “Oh my God, we didn’t actually eat at the Rio, did we?”

“Nope, we were a little too eager to get around to something else, I think.” Kyun chuckled.

“You must be starving.”

“There’s a 24-hour burger joint down the street. I’ve heard it’s pretty good. Wanna swing by? On foot, maybe?”

“Sure. Why not?”

As soon as they had slid back into socks and shoes, Jooheon grabbed his wallet, and Changkyun made sure he had his key, they were wandering out into the night.

 

* * *

 

Fifteen minutes later, they were sitting at a retro style two-person booth, chowing down on chocolate shakes, thick beef patties on pretzel buns, and some of the best sweet potato fries they swore they had ever had. (At the same time, everything tasted better after sex.)

Jooheon couldn’t stop staring at his boyfriend and co-pilot, thoughts from earlier at the forefront of his mind again. He needed a plan, and support for it. Talking was one of his strong suits, so he wasn’t so worried about the latter. However, he had absolutely no idea about the former. How did one even go about approaching the rift to the Kaiju’s world? Would dropping a bomb down it work? Probably not, nothing was that simple. Besides, hadn’t the Pan-Pacific Nations tried that before? If he remembered right, it bounced back and detonated underwater, not even touching the breach. Why? It was almost like–the only things allowed through it were the monsters…

Wait. What if that _was_ the case? It certainly made sense. Now how in the heck would they manage to disguise something, whether Jaeger or bomb, as a Kaiju–?

“…Baby?” Jooheon snapped out of his reverie to find Changkyun’s dark eyes on him. “What are you thinking about?”

“Nothing.” Waving it off, the older boy threw a couple fries in his mouth and sighed, guilty that he had let his mind wander. “I’m sorry that this date hasn’t been quite what we planned.”

“That’s a stupid reason to apologize.” Changkyun reached across the booth and took Jooheon’s hand, rubbing his calloused fingers. “First of all, it’s not solely your fault at all. We’re here because we wanted to be here. If anything, it’s my fault that I–you know, took control.” Of course they weren’t going to speak of it directly; there were others here who could be listening in. “I couldn’t dream of a more perfect date with you. We’ve known each other for so long, been in each other’s heads, and still this is all so new and exciting. I don’t think it’s going to fade for me, either. You make me the happiest, proudest person in the world, Jooheonie.”

A gentle smile spread across Jooheon’s face. “Thank you, Kkungie.”

Once their bellies were full and they had paid, it was back to the motel. They were asleep almost from the moment they crawled under the sheets of the king bed and hit the pillows. Or, at least, Changkyun was. Jooheon wrapped his arms around the younger boy protectively, tangling their legs together, kissing his forehead softly after their murmurs of goodnight.

 

* * *

 

Jooheon wouldn’t have known it was morning except for the sliver of light that peeked in through the tiny gap in the curtains. He didn’t even have noise from outside to let him know a new day was starting. As he laid there and pulled himself together, the events of the night before were fresh on his mind. He also had Changkyun’s head on his chest and hand on his abs to sooth his soul. Though he was barely awake enough to think, with a little smile, he reached over to gently run his hand through the younger boy’s hair. An overwhelming rush of love enveloped him. _My Prince. My Baby._

He was content to lay there for a while, measuring out his breaths so that he didn’t wake Kyunie. The gears in his head began to work more efficiently, and the usual wave of aftershock fatigue hit. Jooheon’s eyes fluttered shut; they didn’t have to get up now. It was fine. No one back at the shatterdome probably even realized that they were still gone. They could stay as long as they wanted. All the better if Changkyun stayed asleep for a couple more hours. Then he’d recharge his energy as much as possible, before he inevitably woke up with one of those blinding headaches.

Jooheon still couldn’t believe the news. It felt like it had been weeks since he had learned, but it was only two nights ago. Kkungie had cancer, and his selfish ass had refused to treat it so that he could live the rest of his life hard and fast.

Almost as if he knew Jooheon had been thinking about him, Changkyun stirred and sighed. His breathing picked up a bit as he woke. Before he had even opened his eyes, he rumbled breathily: “Jooheonie?”

“Yes, baby?”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“Thank you for everything.”

“Of course. You still remember when I said I’d be your best friend until the end, in Air Force basic, right? Nothing’s changed.”

Jooheon could feel cheeks bunch against his breast. The corners of his mouth tipped up. He imagined an incredibly sloppy-haired twenty-one year old’s small lips widening into a signature, gigantic smile.

Neither moved for another long minute, yet. They both wanted this captured forever. Nothing could touch them here. It was a moment without distracting noise or unnecessary movement, without the Kaiju out to destroy humankind and the younger boy’s tumor pressing mercilessly into the back of his skull. Not even the ominous fear of death that had both rangers in its grasp could ruin the content moment.

But the ugly, ugly truth was that life had to go on. They walked a fated path, barreling toward some end or another.

Changkyun shifted, pushing himself up and off. Jooheon almost immediately missed his warmth, which was enough of a motivation for him to get up, too. Moving to the edge of the bed, he rubbed his eyes and asked. “Do you think the tenants will mind if we use their stuff in the bathroom again?”

“If they even realize that we’ve been here.” The younger boy was changing back into his rumpled, messy suit, that somehow still made him look good.

“Oh, they will. Do you think room service cleans their clothes for them?”

“Considering that this seems to be a well-kept private love cave, probably yes.” Changkyun had a point. Some very rich people must stay here, if they had a room in a legitimate motel all to themselves, constantly.

Jooheon finally made himself stand up. He headed for the bathroom, pulling a hairbrush through his hair quick. The dash of hairspray he had applied the night before to hold his hair back away from his forehead was still kind of working. He dealt with it as best he could.

As Jooheon slipped past and traded spots with Changkyun in front of the mirror, they shared their first kiss of the day. It hurt the older ranger deeply to know that he only had so many left. Soon he, too, had changed into his suit, and figured with a little cleaning, they would be ready to go back to base.

 

* * *

 

_Tap tap tap._

Both Jooheon and Changkyun turned to look at each other at the firm knock, clearly on their door.

 _Probably room service,_ Kyun mouthed and shrugged.

The other boy didn’t believe it though, and shook his head. Something was off. _No, they would have said so._ He crept to the door, narrowing one eye to glance through the peephole. Changkyun was right behind him, just as curious.

Jooheon inhaled sharply. There, beyond, stood a tall, slender man. He was unmistakeable in appearance. A frown graced his plush lips; the rangers had seen his handsome features in countless mugshots.

H.One.

 _Holy Shit,_ Jooheon thought to himself. _We’re gonna die._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, it's Bry, I really hope that you enjoyed this installment of Rise Before the Fall! I'm having lots of fun with this. Thanks for waiting for me to update! I'm currently bouncing my attention around between a few different projects, but I hope to have another part up for you within the next month.
> 
> I have really been enjoying seeing all the hits, kudos, and comments so far. You guys drive me on. :) Also, thanks to a cool anon on tumblr for getting my inspiration up as well! You rock!


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